Nice Communicators Share These 7 Traits

When was the last time you heard a great speech? Listened to someone who captivated you with their personal story? Read something that was written so beautifully and powerfully that it challenged your thinking or moved you to action?

For many of us, it may have been a while. That’s because outstanding communication is rarely practiced with the kind of diligence it deserves, even among leaders who count on inspiring their teams to achieve ambitious goals.

People tend to think of exceptional communication as a natural trait, you’ve either got that special something or you don’t. And yet I’m a big believer that great communication can be developed and honed. I’ve seen it happen countless times with leaders who took communicating seriously and were determined to make it a kind of superpower.

This piece shares the most essential skills I believe all great communicators possess. Some may seem like common sense, others less so. Yet when combined, these traits will undoubtedly help you become a more powerful communicator – and leader.

What Does it Mean to Be a Great Communicator?

Great communicators know how to inspire something in their audiences. The inspiration can come in many forms – prompting them to think differently, to reflect on their practices, to learn something, to care about a particular initiative, or to do something differently to achieve an organizational goal.

After all, communication isn’t all that noteworthy if it does not inspire some sort of action on the part of the listener.

The attributes of great communication that we describe below sum up what makes a communicator exceptional.

The 7 Essential Characteristics of All Great Communicators

1. They Know Their Audience and Their Needs

The principle here is simple: the more you know about someone, the better you can listen to them, empathize, support, or guide them in the direction you need them to go as a communicator and leader.

What I’ve learned in my years of consulting is that whether team members or other audiences were actually asking them or not, there are several key questions on their minds, especially during times of crisis. We call them The 8 Key Questions All Employees Have, and here they are:

We’ve drawn inspiration for The 8 Key Questions from one of the leading thinkers in internal communications, Roger D’Aprix, and adapted his model with his permission.

These questions are inspired by the famous psychology theory behind human motivation, Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs. That theory states that people need to fulfill their basic level of needs first before moving to more complex levels of thought or skill. In other words, you can’t build a house or write a novel if you’re literally starving or haven’t slept in weeks.

This obviously is true for employees. If they’re dealing with a lot of unsatisfied basic needs – the “me-focused” needs – those have to be addressed first before employees can think beyond themselves, and start to move from “me” to “we,” with questions such as, “How can I help?”

2. They Demonstrate Empathy

Great communicators know how important it is to walk in another person’s shoes or try to understand what challenges, worries, or concerns may be on their audience’s mind.

I saw many leaders demonstrate exceptional empathy during the COVID-19 pandemic. If there were supply chain concerns, sicknesses, or retention issues inside the workforce, leaders acknowledged the extra demands on their teams and took time to communicate and work out remedies to address the challenges.

For employees, empathy is one of the most important traits that employees look for in their leaders. In survey after survey, employees say they greatly appreciate leaders who communicate with empathy. That fact was underscored recently in an employee survey we conducted with the Harris Poll that explored employee burnout.

Our study found more than 75% of employees and 63% of managers report feeling burned out or ambivalent in their current position. Yet for employees who are thriving, the attitude of their manager, as well as the level of empathy that they communicated, were highly desirable traits. The study also highlighted that employees aren’t just looking for a culture of empathy from their direct managers but from upper management as well.

For the thriving group of employees, the top three contributing factors were:

  • A manager invested in the employee’s success (61%)
  • A manager demonstrating empathy (57%)
  • Approachable senior leadership (53%)

In my recent leadership book, Heart First: What Exceptional Leaders Do in Extraordinary Times, empathy is a core component of what I define as “Heart First” leadership. I describe Heart First Leadership as championing empathy, humanity, and authenticity to build stronger, more trusting relationships and a thriving, purpose-driven organization. Naturally, “Heart First” leaders clearly communicate their natural empathy and humanity in an authentic way, which leads to the third most important characteristic of great communicators … authenticity.

3. They Are Authentic in Their Communication

When I was writing the first edition of Heart First during the pandemic, I learned from many leaders that what it took to be a great leader was clearly put to the test, not only during the pandemic but in the social and political unrest that followed it.

Since that time, many leaders shared that they’ve come to appreciate the power of being more authentic in their communication. The best communicators – and leaders – during that time discarded the pretenses we all tend to adopt at work and embraced more of who they are as people.

“As a black woman in corporate America, I’ve had a bit of a double persona for many years – one person in the office and another at home,” Alisa McGowan, now the Chief People Officer at TAIT, told me. “I wanted to be recognized as a professional, not as a black woman, and so there were parts of my life and story that I just tucked away, never to be shared inside a business meeting of any kind.”

Yet McGowan said that in more recent years, she decided to be more authentic, sharing a bit more of who she is and what she cares about with her teams. She feels this approach has made her a better leader and communicator.

“What I’ve realized over time is that the most important part of leading people is connecting with them in an authentic way, not just through small talk,” McGowan said. “For me, that kind of connection is built through understanding someone else’s journey and someone else’s story.”

I’ve come to a similar realization as a leader, and work to be more open and transparent in my communication than I did when I was younger. I know that employees feel more comfortable with an authentic leader. There are fewer question marks about what’s on the leader’s mind because employees know what to expect, and that’s highly motivating.

One tip for being a more authentic communicator is to spend a little more time reflecting about what matters to you and the messages that matter most to you. A good way to accomplish this is to have a “truth teller” or two around you at work. All of us have blind spots and it’s a truism that the higher you go in an organization, the greater the tendency is that people will tell you what they think you want to hear instead of what you need to hear. Truth tellers help us know what we sometimes can’t see ourselves.

4. They Communicate Often – And Thoroughly

Great leaders look at communication as a process of repetition. Too often, leaders think of communication as a “check-off-the-box” activity. They’ll say, “I sent an email. I’ve communicated.” But this thinking confuses getting the message out with actually creating shared meaning and understanding.

Marketing research has found that the average customer prospect needs to hear a message seven times before they take action. Employees don’t likely need this same attention – their number is probably closer to three or four times – but it still takes several reiterations for the message to sink in. When there’s a major restructuring or strategy initiative, it’s even more important to repeat the messages multiple times.

In fact, I often tell leaders that if they’re getting tired of delivering their message, then that probably means they’re doing their job.

Beyond just repeating messages, leaders should communicate important points in the manner and format that best meets their audience’s needs. Different personalities and work patterns of employees require a “surround sound” approach. Further, influencers, thought leaders, supervisors, and team ambassadors should be engaged. When employees hear the same message from their supervisor, from the CEO, and read it on the company Intranet and other company-backed news sources, they’re more likely to take it in and act on it.

The best leaders already have a regular cadence and rhythm for communicating with key stakeholders. A communications cadence is often defined through a communications calendar of regularly scheduled touchpoints with various audiences. The rigor and the regularity make a big difference in ensuring your communication is truly effective.

5. They Provide Important Context

Have you ever walked into a meeting and the communicator acts as if you’re on chapter 10 of a novel and you haven’t even read the preface? Too often, poor communication happens when leaders don’t provide the right context. The audience needs line-of-sight into why decisions or changes are being made, or why a particular vision for an organization is important in that moment.

To be a great communicator, stop and consider what your audience needs to know related to the following categories:

  • Background/history
  • Strategy and objectives (the end goals you seek)
  • Metrics for success
  • A delineation of priority (what’s most important to focus on)
  • Basic reasons behind important decisions or a change of direction
  • Roles for everyone involved in the change/initiative
  • Knowledge of the ultimate stakes and why a particular initiative is worth the effort

A Tip for Giving Context:

One of the best ways to ensure leaders communicate the right level of context is to ensure you’re telling a complete story, addressing all the key questions. That’s where the 5 Ws and an H comes in. Ask any journalist and they can tell you about the 5 Ws and an H. Any solid news story covers the following six concepts: Who, What, Where, When, Why, and How.

The same is true for communicating inside an organization, especially in uncertain or challenging times. None of these questions can be answered with a simple “yes” or “no.” They require context and detail, so the information is meaningful and relevant and answers the main questions on everyone’s mind.

6. They Listen and Create Dialogue

Great communicators are not always talking. In fact, the best communicators are exceptional listeners eager to dialogue with their audiences and hear their perspectives.

Great communication happens when leaders and their employees or colleagues understand each other. Knowing where another person is coming from is critical to move any organization forward.

Exceptional communication should include a sincere invitation for feedback, giving people the chance to respond truthfully and know that their opinion – whether it’s in agreement with a sentiment or not – is always welcome. The quickest way to shut down communication is to give an audience no opportunity to express an opposing view, challenge a particular direction, or ask multiple questions. Dialogue is always the best way to build trust and understanding.

7. They Are Open to Questions and Prepared to Answer Them

One of the most common things that can keep any communicator up at night is thinking about what kinds of tough questions they might get when there’s something especially weighty or potentially controversial.

And like anything, the surefire way to handle tough questions well is to prepare for them. Think through the questions you’re most likely to get and how best to answer them. Then practice – out loud – an answer to the questions that are most likely to be the toughest.

Great communicators know just how important this process is and they make time to prepare. It’s often helpful to work with a team so everyone can think through the potential questions that may be on the audience’s mind.

In thinking about the answers, consider the following:

  • The perspective the employee might bring to the discussion
  • The empathy that’s important to demonstrate to the audience as you respond
  • The respectful authenticity that is critical in your response. People need to feel that you sincerely care about the team and want to be real with them about the challenges/roadblocks ahead
  • When tough questions surface, communicate the following:
    • Here’s what I know
    • Here’s what I don’t know
    • Here’s what I’m working on finding out

7 Easy Steps for Achieving Great Communication in Your Next Conversation

Great communicators inspire their teams by showing they care. To create a culture where people feel their input is valued, the best communicators demonstrate active listening with some of the following tried-and-true techniques:

  1. Approach each dialogue with the goal to learn something. Regardless of the employee’s level or role, think of the person you are speaking with as someone who can teach you. Have an open mind without pushing an agenda.
  2. Stop talking and focus closely on the speaker. Suppress the urge to think about what you’re going to say next or to multitask. Be present and show you care.
  3. Open and guide the conversation with broad, open-ended questions that prompt dialogue and cue to the employee that you want to learn more.
  4. Drill down to the details by asking direct, specific questions that focus on the conversation, such as “Tell me more about … ” or “How did you come to that conclusion?” or “How would this idea work?”
  5. Summarize what you hear and ask questions to check your understanding. Throughout the conversation, paraphrase what you hear to show you are actively listening and considering the employee’s point of view.
  6. Encourage with positive feedback. Show appreciation for the team member’s willingness to share thoughts, even if you don’t necessarily agree with all that’s being shared. Encourage others to express their points of view and be authentic with an observation like, “The fact that you and I may disagree on a topic is a good thing,” and share why.
  7. Listen for total meaning. Understand that in addition to what is being said, the real message may be nonverbal or emotional. Tone of voice, crossed arms, and poor eye contact can be clues that someone is feeling they aren’t being heard or understood.

The Bottom Line

I have often said that great communication truly is a superpower. Today, with constant change and some upheaval being the norm in most organizations, exceptional communication has never been more critical to success.

And here’s what’s especially encouraging: I’ve learned from my own experience and with clients that when it comes to communicating at a higher level, it doesn’t have to be as difficult as some leaders may feel it is.

True, in the busyness of everyone’s daily work life, sometimes it feels easier to just not communicate. Cutting corners in communicating may not feel like a big deal. Yet in retrospect, poor communication is usually the top reason mistakes get made, deadlines get missed, and even the most promising initiatives fail. As I titled my first two books, “You Can’t NOT Communicate,” I’ve learned that not communicating is communicating a message, too – maybe one of confusion or indifference. So, if everything communicates, you might as well do it well. And, these essential traits are a great place to start.

What’s missing from this list of essential traits that you think make for great communication? What have you found to be most effective?

David Grossman

For a quick reference guide on how to stand out as a leader, download our eBook, Top 11 Attributes of Exceptional Leaders and Communicators. Or, share with a leader or colleague you know is looking to elevate their impact.

New call-to-action


COMMENTS